How to Win Friends & Love People ($20)

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There are two fundamental flaws in the way “charisma” (i.e. executive presence, personal magnetism, influential likability) is taught:

(1) It is about ego, not love.

(2) It is taught as behaviours to fake, not qualities to cultivate.

But character-based charisma consists of three parts: authentic authority, generosity, and joy.

If we have authority without generosity, it is ego. If we have generosity without authority, it is unhelpful. But if we combine all three, we have magic! Think of people like Michelle Obama, Richard Branson, Nelson Mandela, Abdul Kalam, or the Dalai Lama. Even if you disagree with them, you can’t help but like them.

So then, what can we do to increase our influential likability? Not to serve ourselves, but to win friends and love people.